Wednesday, August 30, 2006

It Does A Body Good...

From TampaBays10.com, via Fark.com...

Camel's Milk: Viagra of the desert?

New Delhi, India - One hump or two?

Camel's milk is hot stuff in India because of its supposed effect as an aphrodisiac. The run on camel's milk was prompted by an 88-year-old man who fathered a child.

The Times of India newspaper reports the man attributes his virility to the drink. The paper reports prices for camel's milk have now doubled. But don't bother walking a mile for this camel. Indian medical researchers dismiss the notion that camel's milk could be the Viagra of the desert.


I don't know whether it works or not, but my Wife has ordered 50 gallons.

Monday, August 28, 2006

Carville: If we can't win in this environment, we have to question the whole premise of the party.''

BAAAHAHAHAHAHAHahahahahahah!!!...

HAHAHAhahahahahahah!!...

Hahahahaha!...

Please stop it!

I can't take it!...

HAAAAHahahahahahah!!

Hohohohohohoh...

Heeheeheee...

Huhuhmn...

Ahemn...

High On The Hog...

My Wife and I just returned from a little weekend getaway to picturesque Orlando Florida.

Going to Orlando for the weekend is nothing unusual for us. We live about an hour and a half from Orlando, and we both hold Yearly Passes to the Universal Studios Theme Parks which allow us to walk right in like we own the place. We go all the time.

But this time we did it a little differently.

This time, we got a room in one of the Resort Hotels on the property.

It was obscenely expensive.

But we had been planning for this trip for quite a while, and my plan was to set things up so that all weekend, the answer never had to be "No, we can't afford that."

We were shuttled from the Hotel to the Parks on a little boat, we had Fast Passes (included in the price of the room) which allowed us to skip right to the front of the line on any ride we wanted to ride. We soaked in the Hot-Tub, raided the Mini-Bar, put the "Do Not Disturb" sign on the door, and basked in the lap of Luxury.

My Wife's brother and his Wife went with us, and on Sunday Night, we all dressed up and went to dinner at Emeril's Tchoup Chop (pronounced "Chop Chop", due to the fact that you cut up your credit card when you leave the place), where I paid $170.00 for 16 ounces of Filet Mignon, eleven roasted potatoes (which looked suspiciously like left-over Home-Fries from the Breakfast Buffet at the restaurant next door...), three Scallops and a handful of Onion Straws, shared between my Wife and me.

I could have cooked the whole meal over a can of Sterno in the Hotel Room for about $15, and you would not have been able to tell the difference in the food.

But I did not go there for the food.

I went there to look at the Waterfall on the back wall while I ate. I went to see if there were any fish in the raised Tile Pond in the center of the restaurant. I went to have the waiter fluff my napkin and put it on my lap for me, and ask every two minutes if I wanted more Mineral Water.

I went for the experience.

And it was great.

I have always had to be extremely careful with money my whole life, but for one weekend, I was P.Diddy in Orlando, and it felt wonderful.

I do not know what your financial status may be, but DO THIS.

At least once in your life, just go away somewhere with your Wife/Girlfriend/Boyfriend/Partner/Complete Stranger, and forget about the cost. For just a few days, do whatever you want, no matter what.

And when you get back home, be happy about the fact that you did it. Don't second guess it.

You will not be sorry.

Nancy Pelosi: Anybody Who's Dealt With Me Knows Not To Mess With Me...

AAHAHAHAHAHAHahahahahahahahah!!!...

Hahahahahhaahahaahhaahahahahah!!...

Hah hah hah hah hah ha ha ha!!...

Ho ho ho!!...

Ha ha hah...

Oh, my goodness...

(Tug wipes tears of laughter away from eyes...)

Huhm hmm hmm hmm...

Ahem...

Hehemmm...

Tuesday, August 22, 2006

Vindication...

I do not discuss the issue of Abortion very often on my own Blog. I will occasionally engage on the subject at other sites, but I know that no agreement will ever be reached between those who believe that a woman should be allowed to abort her healthy unborn baby in order to correct her own mistake, and those who believe that to do so is to cut short the life of an innocent human being.

The one other time that I spoke about my view of abortion here was the first and only time I was ever called a Nazi.

I was called a Nazi because of this statement:

"I think that women SHOULD be allowed to terminate pregnancies. If the Democrat Party wants to continue to Abort their Voter Base, that's fine with me."

And how the fur did fly.

I was told that rooting for the elimination of the children of my political adversaries was immoral. I was told that Democrats were not the only people who have Abortions. (We all know that Pro-Life Right Wing Republicans have Abortions all the time...)

I was told that the type of hatred that I displayed was more in line with Nazi Germany than in Modern Free America, where women can freely choose to kill their own babies, and we are supposed to do nothing to stop them, but we all must pretend to be appropriately sorrowful for them, because they have been forced to make such an unfortunate choice.

But facts are facts.

I am a Conservative because my parents instilled Conservative Values in me from a very young age.

I assume that Liberal Parents would try to encourage Liberal Ideals in their children as well.

But lately Liberals seem to have more and more trouble winning National Elections, and as far as I know, it has occured to no one else but me that there may be a connection between this trend and the insistence of Liberal Democrats to protect the right of their women to abort their children.

Then tonight, I found this at the Drudge Report.

The Fertility Gap
Liberal politics will prove fruitless as long as liberals refuse to multiply.
BY ARTHUR C. BROOKS Tuesday, August 22, 2006 12:01 a.m. EDT

The midterm election looms, and once again efforts begin afresh to increase voter participation. It has become standard wisdom in American politics that voter turnout is synonymous with good citizenship, justifying just about any scheme to get people to the polls...

On the political left, raising the youth vote is one of the most common goals.

The trouble is, while most "get out the vote" campaigns targeting young people are proxies for the Democratic Party, these efforts haven't apparently done much to win elections for the Democrats. The explanation we often hear from the left is that the new young Democrats are more than counterbalanced by voters scared up by the Republicans on "cultural issues" like abortion, gun rights and gay marriage...

But the data on young Americans tell a different story. Simply put, liberals have a big baby problem: They're not having enough of them, they haven't for a long time, and their pool of potential new voters is suffering as a result.

The article does not make the connection, but I do.

Can you imagine how different things would have been, had Thirty Million voting-age people, all raised by Pro-Choice Left Leaning parents (or mothers, as the case may be) shown up to vote in the 2000 Presidential Election?

Is this not further evidence of how Liberalism is ultimately it's own punishment?

Sunday, August 20, 2006

Oooh, Shiny!

Yesterday was Xena's birthday.

She turned... ahem...a year older than she was.

She has worried about this birthday. She says that she is getting too old.

I think that she has barely gotten grown. As far as I'm concerned, she's just right. If she were any younger she wouldn't have dated me because I would have been too old for her, and if she were any older, she would have been looking for a whole lot more stable and successful man than me.

I managed to catch her right in that perfect phase that women go through between gullible and driven, and I managed to fool her into marrying me.

Over the past couple of weeks I have been trying to decide what to give her for her birthday. That has been harder than I thought it would be. (You see, I normally take such good care of her that she never wants for anything anyway.) ( Ha! You believe that too, don't you?)

She said she wanted a new dishwasher (I don't know why, though...the one we've got works fine...), a new gas grille, a set of pots and pans, or a necklace that I picked out.

Well, I want a new gas grille too, so I can't get her that. If I tried to buy her pots and pans, you can rest assured that I would buy the wrong ones. (Don't ask.)

That leaves the necklace.

So friday night after work, I stopped off at the fine jeweler Jean Claude Penne', and went shopping.

Me: "Ma'am, how much for that little chain with the three stones in the top corner over there?"

Jewelery sales lady: "Well the normal price on that piece is ( ludicrously expensive), but right now it is on sale, and has been marked down to (ridiculously expensive)."

Me: "Cough, Cough, Gag!...I'm sorry, Ma'am... I wasn't looking to buy her a football stadium, I just wanted to get her a necklace. What do you have that is a little more conservatively priced?"

Sales lady: "Well we have this set over here which is the new spider web sized chain with two microscopic stones, and matching imaginary earrings, normally (ridiculously expensive), now marked down to (prohibitively expensive)."

Me: "Where?"

Sales lady: "Right here. Beneath this price tag."

I have always had trouble picking out jewelery. It is tough for me to get okay with spending thousands of dollars for something that doesn't DO anything.

I wound up buying her a 22" Glitter Cut gold rope chain. Plain, simple, elegant (according to the sales lady), and beautiful.

I gave it to my Wife for her birthday on friday night.

And I found out what jewelery DOES.

And I do not regret spending the money on the chain in any way.

It's been a good weekend.

Happy Birthday, Baby!

Monday, August 14, 2006

Peace At Last!

Well, the War is over! Hooray, Huzzah!

The Bad Guys won.

Hezbollah Claims Win As Cease-Fire Holds
Aug 14, 5:40 PM (ET)By STEVEN R. HURST

BEIRUT, Lebanon (AP) - Tens of thousands of Lebanese jammed bomb-damaged roads Monday to return to homes where they found still-smoldering scenes of destruction after 34 days of vicious combat with Israel ended with a tenuous cease-fire.

Hezbollah fighters hugged each other and celebratory gunfire erupted in Beirut when the Islamic militant group's leader Sheik Hassan Nasrallah claimed a "strategic, historic victory."


All Hezbollah had to do to win was survive as an organization.

And they have.

Thanks to the meddling of the U.N., and the flacid uselessness of the U.S. State Department, they have not only survived, but have retained their weapons, and have gained status as an organization which now has to be appeased and bargained with.

The World has chosen to reward the spoiled child in our midst, and in doing so, has taught the spoiled child how to get it's way. Throw a big enough tantrum, and you can have whatever you want.

Congratulations to all of us.

Peace. Bah!

Situations like this could cause me to hate the very word.

When did fighting bad guys become so terrible and so difficult that it is no longer worth it?

Why is the whole World more and more willing to put up with unacceptable tactics and inhuman actions from groups like Hezbollah, as long as they promise to behave themselves for a few more weeks?

This is not progress. This is not Peace.

This is a chance for Hezbollah to re-group. To re-arm. To dig in a little deeper.

This was no game-winning touch-down.

This was a punt.

Hezbollah will be back to smack the World in the head.

Let's hope that they do not wait until Iran has a Nuclear Weapon to supply to them to smack us with.

This thing is not over. Not by a long shot.

Monday, August 07, 2006

NO CEASE FIRE!!

From Ya-Hoooooo-hoo-hooo News...

U.N. Draft Breaks France-U.S. Impasse...
By NICK WADHAMS, Associated Press Writer Sat Aug 5, 7:01 PM ET

( Oh, Boy...)

UNITED NATIONS - The U.S. and France agreed Saturday on a draft Security Council resolution that seeks a full halt to fighting in Lebanon, breaking a three-week impasse caused partly by Washington's refusal to press Isreal to end its offensive against Hezbollah.

Despite the agreement, fighting raged on. Israeli naval commandos struck the southern port of Tyre before dawn, while Israeli air raids killed at least eight people across Lebanon and a rain of Hezbollah rockets on northern Israel killed three civilians.

The resolution would chart a path toward a lasting peace with a cease-fire monitored by international troops.

No, it wouldn't.

I am so sick of this type of thinking that I cannot stand it.

If a U.N. Resolution would bring Peace between Israel and Islamic Terrorists, there would be Peace already.

Do you want to know how the U.N. can bring Peace, LASTING Peace to the Middle East?

They can BUTT OUT.

Sit down, and shut up.

If the World is really interested in lasting Peace in that region, then we all need to get out of Israel's way, sell them whatever they need, and let them handle their business.

And if they take the whole Nation of Lebanon, they should be allowed to keep the land as a Spoil of War, drive the Lebanese People out, and let the rough end drag.

There needs to be an example made here.

Israel was attacked. Their Soldiers were killed and kidnapped.

They responded.

If they take over any land in this conflict, they have paid for it with the blood of their Soldiers and Civilians.

They should be allowed to push this as far as they want, and to keep whatever they take.

The Arab World needs to be shown that there is a price to be paid for allowing this type of hatred and animosity to fester among them.

They need to be shown that there is a price to be paid for teaching this type of hatred to their children in their schools.

They need to pay a price for attacking their neighbors.

Any manipulation of this situation from outside is a Victory for Hezbollah.

All a cease-fire would do at this point is allow Hezbollah to re-arm and re-supply.

The World MUST stay out of this, and let Israel defeat this group of Terrorists. We all need to let Israel cripple Hezbollah as an organization, to the point that they are no longer able to mount an attack against anyone.

We must get out of the way and let Israel make people PAY for what they have done, and what they have tolerated among themselves.

Or else, we will only give the people of the World the impression that they have no responsibility to oppose hatred and bigotry when it flares up among them because the U.N. will save them from the consequences of allowing these things to gain a foothold in their culture.

The World MUST let this play out to it's inevitable conclusion.

It is the only path to Peace.

Saturday, August 05, 2006

This Isn't Rocket Science, It's Brain Surgery!

There hasn't been a whole lot about the war in Iraq in the News for the past few weeks, because the News Media has been terrified that the Israelis might defeat Hezbollah and the Media might not be able to undermine Israel's efforts and prevent Victory from happening somewhere.

But the Democrat Party in America has not forgotten that there are still Political Gains to be realized by opposing the war here at home, and by bashing the Bush administration.

Rumsfeld Spars With Senators, Defends Handling of Iraq

Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld, facing sometimes hostile questioning Thursday from members of the Senate Armed Services Committee ( Mrs. Bill Clinton), defended his handling of U.S. forces in Iraq as two of his top aides testified that the country is on the verge of sectarian civil war.

"Under your leadership there have been numerous errors in judgment that have led us to where we are," (Mrs. Bill Clinton) said. "We have a full-fledged insurgency and full-blown sectarian conflict in Iraq."

Mrs. Bill Clinton then went on to demand Rumsfeld's Resignation, and to lament the fact that we "can't get new leadership that would give us a fighting chance to turn the situation around before it's too late..."

And on that note, I would like to take this opportunity to call for the resignations of Senator Mrs. Bill Clinton, Senator Dick Durbin, Senator John F. Kerry, Senator Ted Kennedy, Rep. John Jack Murtha, Senator Harry Reid, Rep. Nancy Pelosi, Jeanine Garafalo, Jerry Springer, Al Franken, Cindy Sheehan, and Michael Moore. (Among others.)

Picture this...

Picture a patient who is afflicted with a brain tumor. This tumor has so affected the patient's judgment that he now does nothing but scream threats at everyone around him, and it has even caused him to attack his next door neighbors from time to time.

One team of doctors believes that this patient can be treated by sitting on the floor, burning incense, and talking about his feelings.

Another team of doctors believes that surgery is the only option.

Those in charge of the decision opt for surgery, but in the interest of representing all sides of the debate, the surgery will be performed in a room with the other team of doctors watching, and offering commentary as the surgery progresses, and the whole event will be broadcast to the World via closed circuit TV.

While the surgeon works, the other team of doctors screams and wails. "LOOK at all the BLOOD! He's sawed the top of his HEAD OFF! He can't possibly live with his brain exposed like that! This guy is a Quack! A Chimp! He doesn't know what he is doing! This has to be STOPPED! OH, THE HUMANITY!"

The other team will be allowed to turn off the lights, hide the surgeon's tools, bang drums, chant, march around in circles all over the operating room, and to place the cameras between the surgeon and the patient.

And every ten minutes, a poll is taken of the viewers, and the results will be yelled into the surgeon's ear through a Megaphone. (But only if they are unfavorable).

That's what is going on here.

Senator Mrs. Bill Clinton is on the Armed Services Committee. She wants to be President.

But remember this.

Her Husband and she, the Co-Presidents, had eight years in which to deal with Iraq, and even said that Saddam Hussein was a problem that had to be dealt with, stating in 1998 that the U.S. should adopt a policy of regime change in Iraq.

But they did nothing.

So now, when you hear her criticisms of the way the War is being run, remember that it is armchair quarter-backing, and take it as such.

This War would have been over a long time ago, were it not for the American Left, and the American News Media.