Tuesday, June 17, 2008

Cave Time...

I've been getting along surprizingly well since my Wife left me.

I've done my own cooking...

A little cleaning...

Rearranged some furniture...

Even caught up on my sleeping.---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------(Just joking... Of course I'm not sleeping on the couch...)

(Not ALL the time, anyway...)-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Okay, I'm not fooling anyone for a minute with this "Wife left me" gag, am I?

She did, sort of, but just for a few days. She took Caleb up the coast to visit with his cousins, aunts and uncles in Niceville and Gulf Breeze.

I stayed behind because I can't afford to take any more time off work. (Worst Economy since Julius Caesar, and all that...)

And I miss them.

Caleb is going to crawl any minute, and I am going to miss it.

But it's okay... They'll be back soon, and I will get to see it then.

In the meantime, I'm kind of enjoying this little bit of "Cave Time". You don't usually get much of that after the children come.

There are things about being married that nobody tells you. (Or at least, nobody told me...)

Nobody told me that after you get married, you don't really get to eat whatever you want anymore... Bologna, Vienna Sausages, Liver Pudding, Banana Sandwiches... These things are off the menu when a Woman is doing your meal planning and cooking. (Not that I'm complaining... I'm not sure why I was eating that stuff in the first place.)

But today, I decided that since I don't have to answer to anybody this week, I would have myself a Liver Pudding Sandwich.

Only I can't.

Liver Pudding was an item which appeared at our house probably three or four times per year when I was growing up. It's a kind of... well it's like... It's... Well, it's pork liver. Mashed into a pulp, with some corn meal added to improve the texture, a few spices added to improve the flavor, and then it's usually stuffed into a sausage casing to ruin whatever was improved in the other steps.

The very mention of the stuff is enough to evoke violent wretching sounds from my Wife.

I decided to go and get me some today.

But I live in Florida now, so I am denied access to such culinary delights as Liver Pudding, because the people down here have no idea what good food is. The woman at the Meat Market made a face and said flatly:"Never heard of it."

"Oh yeah? You know, this would be a darn good place for a Meat Market now, wouldn't it?"

So I made Chicken Salad instead.

When I am finally driven back to North Carolina where I belong, food will be what does it.

You can't get any here.

You can't get a decent Cheeseburger, no Sun Drop, no Liver Pudding, no Fat-Back... And the Bar-B-Que down here is a reddish, sticky, slimy substance with some type of meat-fibers strung through it. (I guess it's pretty good if you've never had the real stuff... BBQ sauce is Vinegar based, not tomato based, for crying out loud!!)

All that being said, I'm not losing any weight down here, so I guess it's all right.

My Chicken Salad was good, anyway. (Mayo salad, not lettuce salad... I am a man, you know...)

I just hope my Wife comes back home before my colesterol reaches lethal levels...

Maybe it's better that I couldn't find the Liver Pudding after all...


Mark said...

My God! Your diet sounds worse than mine!

I was just denied a Life insurance policy. They said because of my medical history. I don't have a medical history! I never go to a doctor, because I'm never sick. At least not with anything more serious than a cold.

Maybe my last Lab test shows something serious and I wouldn't be surprised if it has something to do with my diet:

Fast foods, meat, and potatoes. No salads, few vegetables, definetly no health foods. I don't drink water. Only diet sodas. Dessert whenever i want it. Liver pudding? Yeeech! Although I do like Braunsweiger and crackers, but not with bread. Braunsweiger tastes horrible on bread.

My wife tries to make me eat right, too, but I fight her off.

tugboatcapn said...

Well, my diet really isn't that bad...

When the Wife is here, I live almost entirely on boneless skinless chicken breasts, fresh vegetables, home cooked pasts dishes of various types and the occasional steak/baked potato meal.

I hardly ever eat fast food anymore... although when I was single, I ate so much of that stuff that it didn't even look like food anymore.

And don't get me wrong about the Liver Pudding... I'm not looking to add that particular delicacy back into my regular rotation...

I just haven't had any for a long time, and it reminds me of home.

I'm sure you've eaten wierder stuff that Liver Pudding over the course of your life, haven't you?

Daffy76 said...

I can't figure out, from all the things Mom made over the years, why Liver Pudding was your choice. Home (to me) is corn chowder, meatloaf, or, oddly enough, fried bologna. Liver pudding is just a bad memory for me.

When Lewis was little, he and Rob used to go to their Aunt Louise's house to play. She would serve them liver (not liver pudding), real liver--a dish we were never served (at least I can't remember it--thank goodness!). But she would tell Rob and Lewis that they were eating pork chops. They believed her. Of course, they were only 4 or 5 years old at the time. The worst part of all of this is that every time we see her now, she brings that up. In the ten years she's known me she hasn't managed to come up with another story to tell me about Lewis.

Mark said...

If you don't close up that bread wrapper, your bread is going to get stale.

Mark said...

Oh yeah--- I like Kool-Aid
, too.

Timothy said...

I'm not sure I like your diet. Sorry, just can't get into liver pudding...

But I must confess that I can't really remember what I ate before I got married. I do know the first time I went to the grocery store for Elisa after we got married, I was shocked at the bill. She said, "But that is because all the people in the church feed you ever couple of days." She was right! :)

Maybe you ought to do a list of the top 5 things you miss about being single...

For me,
1. being on time.
2. being able to watch as much sports, tv or movies that I want to...
3. being able to....

Well, that's all I miss that I can think of. Glad I'm not still single.

ChefNele said...

Liver Pudding......well, I've heard of weirder things. Way back when I was in Culinary School, your wife (my sis), came to an open house we put on in the middle of the school year and we served two types of terrines. Now, what is a terrine you might ask? A Terrine is like a molded meat-pudding made up of several types of ground meats depending on the recipe, and served COLD, with a slimy clear but fatty substance on top, which is even slightly more gross than the terrine itself. So, Liver Puddin' might just be a version of a terrine, but without the other meats, and without the molding. Was it served hot or cold?
Anyhow, it doesnt sound like something I would eat, and it certainly doesnt sound like something DJ would make for you to eat, and I would go ahead and find a way to stop missing it if I were you, because you might not be getting any for a while.......Hahaha. Hang in there buddy, she will be back soon, and you can have more boneless skinless chicken breasts........