Tuesday, July 19, 2005

Hot For Teacher...

Well, Greco Middle School teacher Deborah Lafave is back in the news, and guess what??

She's going for the insanity defense!! I don't know if I can survive the shock!! I mean, how will she and her attourney ever convince a jury that a 23 year old woman with a brand new career and a gainfully employed, good looking husband would throw her whole life away just to provide oral sex to a 14 year old male student?

I think the insanity defense is a monumentally bad idea. The problem with pleading insanity is that right off the bat, she's admitting she did it. No going back after that. She may as well say "The Devil made me do it!!"

I am not a lawyer, and I know that nothing that I say can really help her, but I thought that I would suggest some alternative defense strategies...

Her lawyer is already on the trail of my first strategy, however I don't think that he fully realizes the possibilities of his line of thinking, so I will try to flesh out the idea for him (so to speak.)
He said this morning that she is "too pretty" to go to jail. Yeah! That's the ticket!
I will say this much for her... she is ONE HOT CHILD MOLESTER! Wowsers! Holy Moley!! This chick is a top shelf example of why I love living in the Tampa Bay area.
But just pointing out that she is pretty is not going to be enough. Her lawyer needs to come up with a few catchy little rhyming phrases to chant at the jury.
Such as..."If she has nice (?), you must aquit!" (If only I could think of a word that rhymes with "aquit"...) Okay I'm still working on that one.

Or, how about this?
She could call a big national press conference, practice making her lower lip tremble, and at the press conference, stare directly into the camera, stick her index finger into the air and as seriously as she can, say "I did NOT have sexual relations with that boy Mr.(name withheld to protect the identity of a minor.) Then she can assert that her sex life is none of anyone's business, declare the whole thing a witch hunt, and deny, deny, deny. She could also demand that the whole thing be dropped so that she can get back to the business of educating America's children. As long as she has destroyed HER blue dress, it should work. (If precedent is any indicator, anyway...)

Or maybe she could ask for a change of venue to Santa Maria, California, then admit that she slept in the bed with the boy, and in the backseat of the car, and that they were naked together occaisionally, but there is nothing wrong with anything that they did. It's beautiful! It's love! She was just showing her LOVE! She could tell the jury that she just LOVES children. (Especially the BOY children...)

What is she really guilty of anyway? All she did was help a young, innocent schoolboy to realize his dreams!


Okay, I've had my fun, now let's get serious about this. (The jokes were just too easy...)

I do not believe that this young woman should be put in prison. She is a very disturbed individual. If you don't believe that then you should listen to the taped telephone conversations between her and the kid. These tapes will make your hair stand on end. (No offense intended to any bald people out there.) She has a very severe disconnect with reality.

In other words, The chick ain't right.

I can believe that she didn't realize that what she was doing was wrong.

However, I don't believe that she should be released either.

She is a sick person, and she should be confined to an institution until such time as she can be trusted around young boys again. Under no circumstances should she be allowed to ever teach school again, and if she gets a book deal out of this episode, all proceeds should be diverted to rape crisis centers for underage victims.

Nobody is too pretty to go to jail, but I believe that Deborah Lafave is absolutley too ill to go to jail.

This young woman is not John Couhy. She is not a monster who rapes and kills helpless victims.
She needs help, and now maybe she will get it.

I wish her and her attourney the best of luck.


Daffy76 said...

Wow. If I didn't know better, I'd think you were going soft. :)

I totally agree. This is the same thing I've said about Michael Jackson repeatedly. He is a person in need of psychiatric care and its obvious just by looking at him.

Garza said...

Thanks for the nice comments. I have been working on my house and have taken a few weeks off.

In regards to your post, why could we not have had anything like this happen to us when we were 14, instead of always having an old bitty with an axe to grind? Just kidding. She does need help, but I am like you, I would not have put up the insanity defense, I might have gone with this is a disturbed young lady that needs help defense, along with the quivering lower lip. They might buy that, but then again, if she was uglier she would probably have a better chance.

o-likewoah said...

Yeah and what about the kid- can we get him some mintal help too (just out of curosity cause i am out of the loop) - is this the same case that i saw on the news where that happend and the teacher was let out of jail to go back to the opean arms of her former student whom she "loved" last i heard they were together (cause they were "in love")... i dunno its all gross

Toad734 said...

Why couldn't I ever have been molested?

She could go with the yellow cake uranium defense.

Mark said...

Tug, in regards to your statement:
"I will say this much for her... she is ONE HOT CHILD MOLESTER! Wowsers! Holy Moley!!"
I have to say, I agree. Now I wish I were 14 again.

Erudite Redneck said...

My high school senior English teacher was Miss Fine. And boy was she. About 23 or 24, fresh out of teacher's college. Lawsy. It was all us hairy-legged bous could do to sit still.